( s p a c e

t o

b r e a t h e )
.
.
.

When the dog bites, when the bee stings, when I'm feeling sad... I think of a few of my favorite things, and then I don't feeeeeeel... sooo baaaaaaaad.

---

I dreamed that I was moving back into my current apartment. I don't know if I was older or anything, as it felt like now. My sister and her friends were helping me, Noah was helping me, and all my friends wer having a sort of 'moving party' on the porch, sittin and drinkin some beers. I had been driving my stuff over, through any number of tunnels that looked like Geary St. (in SF). It was twilight, and it just felt like a good time for life. I had this feeling I had left my car unlocked with a bunch of stuff in it, and I thought, 'aaah, it'll be okay', and then I thought, 'I dunno Delphi, there's such a thing as looting.' But I don't think I ended up going to lock it.

People were starting to head out. My sister bid me a happy farewell, and her friends left with her; Noah was telling me to tell him a day when he could come and help me keep moving in, and I was like, Why? He said, so he can thank me for such-and-such. I was pooh-poohing him when AaronB was making to leave, and he said, "So how's your snake?" [Young Nick asked me this question the last time I saw him.] I was like, "She's all right." Aaron started to turn away and he said, maybe to himself, "Ehhh, I'll see her tomorrow." I replied quickly and half-sarcastically, "I don't know, you can't guarantee that, and you only live so long. Or so short as the case may be." He smiled and came back to give me a hug; I turned my head away and he buried his face in my neck. As we separated, he made his sarcastic yesss-fist, and goes, "Yess, here I am, seizing the day, living in the moment." The way he does when he's making fun of a cheesy emotion he's actually feeling. AaronS laughed.

---

So did I mention that I'm watching my friends' cats? Two cats are staying over at my house, and they are total sweeties. They didn't have any trouble adjusting; they're indoor cats anyhow. Said friends should be back any day now (in fact, they're late, and they haven't returned my call). But I've grown used to having a weird, cute little presence in the house. I had essentially given up the idea of having a cat; I'm too messy, not as stable as I should be, etc. But after being their mom for over a week, it seems a not impossible and highly pleasurable thing to do. So again, I may.

And I don't know if it's the cats, or what, but I've been having to take serious naps lately. I napped practically all day on Saturday, and I took one for a couple hours today. I don't know why, I haven't been a napper for a long time. And this after we dicussed bad sleeping habits in Psychology! (Apparently, if you are sleeping properly every night, you oughtn't wish to sleep during the day at all. Hence something called 'sleep debt'.) I am, however, having those rich nap-dreams again. The above being an example, along with other weirdly satisfying ones. I feel like maybe the cats are keeping me from proper REM sleep. Maybe not. The difference, if I had my own cat, would be that it would be allowed out, so that it wouldn't race so much around my house at night. So I would hope.

6:40 p.m. 2004-10-11�

previous - next

P. L. Random H. M.�

about this diary - in case you have some sort of issue
miscellany
making wings
links
notes

older
contact
dland